A Better Mood...

Yesterday I had the blues and the crankies. It was unlike me. I am usually the "glass half full", "every cloud has a silver lining" kind of person. But yesterday I did not feel like being the bluebird of happiness.  My tolerance for bullshit was completely gone. Did not want to hear it or deal with it in any way. My Libra scales were tilted...Was I mean? No. Was I selfish? No. Was I rude? No. So what was the big fucking deal???????? Not one, really. I have my moments like everyone else.  But I don't like feeling that way. I believe each day is what you make it. It is up to each of us to find the joy and to feel and share the love. Even in my funky mood yesterday, I realized and gave thanks for my blessings. I woke this morning with a smile on my face and a better attitude. And to Spirit I say, "Thank you for this day and the opportunity to be thankful for it. Bless those I love and keep them close. Please give me eyes to see and ears to hear and the power of love and peace in my heart. Amen." ~ Have a joyous day. ~

Favorites..

Snuggling on sofa and watching some t.v...
Drinking a cold beer while cooking spaghetti...
Listening to music and buying new earrings..
These are a few of my favorite things...

Time spent with Tony...
My kids smiling faces...
Seeing old friends ...
Going new places...
Laughing and talking...
I might even sing...
These are a few of my favorite things.

Reading a good book...
Seeing a movie...
A really great workout...
Using my creativity...
Painting my toenails and wearing my bling...
These are a few of my favorite things.

Sunflowers and roses...
Candles and moonlight...
Buttery popcorn...Peanut butter delight.
Fun Saturday nights...
Lazy Sunday mornings...
These are a few of my favorite things...

Decisions

What to do? Wanting to resolve this situation in an intelligent and productive and, yes, profitable manner. Should I be willing to walk away with less? And would it really be less if it gave me my freedom? I am tired of looking back...tired of revisiting...I do not want the responsibility of this thing anymore. Can the thing that held me down turn around and set me free? Please let me go...

For the first time...

For the first time, I feel and believe there is someone who won't walk away from me because I am far less than perfect. For the first time, I have someone who won't laugh at my tears.  For the first time, I feel like I no longer fall short in someone's eyes. For the first time, I have someone who will stand by me, support me and protect me. I am learning to trust completely...for the first time.

One step forward...

Seems like I'm doing that funny little dance of one step forward, two steps back. Guess as long as progress is being made, I should be encouraged and I am...

So tired of that shadow falling across my shoulder ... trying to shine like the sun.

Resolutions

The start of a new year...I am looking forward to great things. It's a little scary as well because I'm walking on completely new ground for the first time in many years. My main resolution is to hold on to the good things, past and present, and let go of the sadness and fear and anger that wrapped me up for so long. My life has had sweet mixed in with the bitter and it is the sweetness I need to remember. I feel positive and completely happy about my life these days. I have been told by some people that I am the strongest person they know. Many days that makes me laugh...I don't always feel strong. I must be though or I would not be here today. Sometimes I have to look back so I can see my toughness and believe in it. Some people mistake my tenderness for weakness. They are foolish to think that. You have to be strong to go through what I have and still be able to share your heart and give your love freely and to see the good in people. I let the past give me faith instead of stealing my hope for each day. So I guess my resolution is to keep being me...to do and be the best I can...to love with all my heart...to keep the faith. Happy New Year.